Memory Lane?

Ok. Long story short. Actually it's more of a 'not wanting to have to tell the whole pathetic story.'

But what the hell. I forgot the password AND the username of my new blog, the one dedicated to my sewing project and stuff. I thought the URL is pretty catchy and I so badly want to keep it.

Tried to retrieve it, blogger sent me all the blogs that I have ever created under the e-mail address I'm using now. Apparently I've had this e-mail since I was 17. God. That's why I'm one of the few still using hotmail. Heh, back then hotmail was HOT, twas the shiz, I tell you.

The problem is I actually created a new e-mail especially for the new blog. And I've completely forgotten it. Just like that. What am I a goldfish or something? Erghhh.

They say every wrong turn is a lesson learnt. So what did I learn? I've learnt that I've had 3 different blogs under the e-mail address, and for each one I've only ever posted one post. Maybe I forgot the password too, just like this recent case.

One blog was written when I was 17.

Another when I was 19.

To read it now feels surreal. Like an out-of-body experience. I mean, did I really use to be that girl? But I guess when you were 17 you are kinda allowed to feel as if every little problem seems like the universe is conspiring against you. Lawak gila weh sumpah gelak pecah perut tadi dengan Tasha teringat zaman kanak-kanak.

Oh and allow me to quote my 19-year-old self :

but this is real world. knock, knock.
most of all, this is my life.
at 19, i'm still not sure of who i wanted to be. well, yeah, i'm doing a preparation to pursue my engineering study in german next year but hmm, i'm still not sure if that is what i wanted to do with my life. can you see how confused i am?

Well guess what. Four frigging years later, it didn't get any better. I still can't say for sure what I wanted to be and heck yeah, I'm still as confused. How's that. Shiznit (pinjam Tash's fave word).

To my 19-year-old self, sorry for not having my (our?) shiz just quite together yet but bear with me. I'm getting there. Soon. Have faith.