Hell Hath No Fury As A Woman Scorned.

"NOW!"

"NO!"

"You've been standing there for almost 5 minutes now.."

"Well sorry for being extra cautious and not wanting to be another sad roadkill."

"If you don't cross the road now, we are going to miss Cik Siti's nasi dagang at bazar today..."

"We wouldn't if only you had dropped me on the other side 10 minutes ago..."

"OK NOW! NOW IS GOOD! GO JUST GO GO GO!" my mom screamed from the rolled down window from the driver's seat.

"Alright alright," marching on with my three-inches wedges, I brazed the crazy traffic to get to the other side, risking my life, and my possibly bright future, just because my dear mom didn't want to have to do a U-turn so that her precious daughter, her only daughter, could get down safely on the other side. I mean, what's going in circle two times along a busy road during peak hour compared to your precious daughter's safety??

To top it off, I was carrying ten packages that day, and that posed an extra danger as it might obstruct my vision. When I got to the other side of the road safely, I heard a honk. I turned around and I saw my mom with a wide smile giving me the thumb up sign. Yeah thanks a lot mom. She knows just how terrified I am of crossing the unforgiving roads in Malaysia and she enjoys using that fact to torture me.

It was almost 5.30p.m, nearing post office's closing time. There was several other customers at the counter. Sigh. I really hope we wouldn't miss Cik Siti after all. All I could think of during this final critical time of fasting is food. And iced mango juice..

Sometimes we would go to the main post office, but this branch is closer to our house. The downside is, all the process are not computerized as in the main branch, forms have to be filled manually by the clerk, so it would take a bit longer than usually. But I don't really mind. It's not like it takes hours. Just a couple extra minutes.

When it was my turn, I propped all of the stuff I brought on the table. The lady who worked behind the counter smiled when she saw me. I've been there several times before so she recognized me already. She has been very helpful and friendly that I enjoy chatting to her while waiting for her to prepare my packages for PosLaju's shipping. I think if every public service officer has a work attitude like this lovely lady, they could finally shed their negative image of being unfriendly and unproductive.

She was finishing off my last package when a man, wearing a serban walked up to the counter and said to me, "Depa ni buat kerja lembab sungguh la.. (I will not translate his dialog so that you wouldn't miss the essence)."

The clerk and I were taken aback by his statement so I forced a smile and said, "Customer ramai tapi yang kerja dua orang ja pakcik, tu lambat sikit tu.."

"Tapi kalau dah semua orang pandai masuk U sapa nak kerja kat sini kan kehkehkeh," he said in a very cynical tone, as if his words weren't sharp enough. Well I'm pretty sure he has a double PhD and an IQ over 150 for him to make such a condescending statement like that.

Err awkward moment ensued.

The lady behind the counter just kept quiet, her face flushed. I felt sorry for her but I didn't know what to respond to that to make the situation better. So I turned to her and said thank you with a warm smile before leaving the counter.

The moment I stepped out from the post office my head physically felt hot with anger. I should have stepped up to the situation. Pakcik tak pakcik. He was being rude and he should be put in his place. Plus the clerk didn't deserve such treatment. What I hate more than rude people are rude people in serbans; because I place high respect for Islamic scholars.

I was so angry that I couldn't wait to rush to the car and tell my mom. And I realized later that it took me less than 30 seconds to cross the road.

Some people are just unbelievably and unnecessarily rude to people they deem to be beneath them. I just don't understand the sense of entitlement some people think they have over people whose line of work involves serving them and attending to their needs. They are human with feelings you know.

I Love Vampires and Miley Cyrus

Today, after the eventful (read : disastrous) first paper (I can vividly picture it being flushed down the toilet bowl the moment I saw the first question...I guess a mere week of barely studying stuff I have never laid a finger on for the past five months, while recovering from jet-lag and familiarity won't add up to much) I went home with a heavy feeling and shoulder. The latter being the amount of books I borrowed from the library to study for the next papers. What did father always say about last-minute study? Sigh. Sorry dad, sometimes God has different plans for me.

I was glad that I didn't have to braze the tram during peak hour, the time when kids got out from school. It means having to put up with boisterous kids pushing around to get onto the train. Sometimes it is fun to watch them kids goofing around. Sometimes I just don't feel like it. Like today.

I was daydreaming about my first sewing project ever while walking to the kebab kiosk to get my lunch when a man old enough to be my grandfather stopped me in my track. He said, "Gymnasium, ist schon zum Pause? (Translated : Is it lunch break already at (high) school?)"

It took me some time to pull myself out of my reverie and to understand what he was asking before answering with an amused smile, "Entschuldigung, das weiss ich nicht, bin nicht eine Schuelerin.. (Translated : Sorry, I don't know, I'm not a high-schooler..)"

The point is, saya awet muda haha!

Sekian ceritera untuk hari ini. Have to get back to study ;)

New Obsession

SYes, it was another impulse purchase.

But no, this time, it is NOT going to be another passing obsession. Like the guitar and the E-drums and the rollerblade and the pink bicycle and...the list goes on and on..

It wasn't really an impulse buy per se, as I have been considering it for a while now. Can't wait to get the exams over with, just so I could go shopping for fabric and sew myself gorgeous 60s dresses (Astrid from Sew Sixties is my current inspiration) that would take no longer than two days and pretend that I'm on Project Runway how cool is that!!

Okay that is pretty ambitious for starters, even for a dreamer's standard like me. Let's begin with a curtain and pillowcases.

p.s : This machine is so cool, it has a light AND a thread cutter! Hah I'm unstoppable now! (Don't know if other sewing machines have those as this is my first but allow me to be ciwi* for a while.. )

*ciwi : the state of euphoria or high you get after a satisfactory purchase.

Perhentian Island

Ever noticed how we tend to take for granted things that are slap-bang right in front of our eyes? All of its mystic and its wonder are lost to our eyes somehow. We tend to look further for such things. We figure that something that is so readily available couldn't possibly possess such novelty anymore. If it does, well then we probably have seen it all before. Right?

Most of the times, if we care to look properly, we just might uncover new things everyday from something we thought we knew like the back of our hand (that expression is a lie, I mean, if someone asks me to mentally draw the back of my hand, I could just draw a palm with five fingers protruding, which is the same as most hands in the world..it's not like I have every line and every crease and every hair on the skin memorized, so I guess I do not know the back of my hand pretty well to use that expression).

During my internship where I had the chance to work with a lot of foreigners, I find that their weekend activities are not constricted within the walls of malls and the seats of cinemas, as most of us Malaysians do. I remember the time when a colleague and I took a staff from Singapore branch out to dinner (she was originally from German so I got the chance to practice my rusty Deutsch at least once in the whole course of 6 months), the conversation at one point turned into us, two Malaysians listening to her recounting her experience in Taman Negara, a place that both of us has yet to visit. And she kept urging us to go see the amazing place for ourselves as it would be well worth it! It should be the other way round kan, us using that line on her? Memalukan.. And it wasn't until the boss from Portugal brought up about how he planned to take his 3-year-old kid to see the fireflies in Kuala Selangor that I got the idea to check it out for myself.

It was kinda like a wake-up call, that there is still so many things I haven't seen in my own country, heck I've never ever been to Borneo for crying out loud! So I've made a vow to myself to start discovering as many yet unseen parts of Malaysia as I possibly could. Hence, together with three other friends and the boyfriend, we headed to Perhentian Island, as our last stop this summer. I swear whatever rave review that people has been giving didn't do the island any justice. It was postcard beautiful. And yet my then practical supervisor was telling me that there are islands in Malaysia a hundred times better than that. Whatttt? Sipadan, wait for me, I'm coming!

To get to the island, you need to take a water shuttle from Kuala Besut. The rough journey (being thrown and trashed around like rag dolls inside the boat for almost half an hour was pretty rough) was nothing compared to the visual treat we were served with. The water was see-through. I think it was the first time that I have witnessed a real-life materialization of natural 'crystal clear' water. The corals and their natural habitants were well preserved, at least for now. The moment we got there, we wasted no time in getting our feet wet by trying out the snorkeling gear, to familiarize with it before we went on our snorkeling trip. It was a pleasant surprise to find out that fishes in all sort of imaginable shapes, sizes and colors swimming about right by the shoreline.

I was so happy to get to watch vibrantly colored parrotfishes, half my size, grazing on the coral and pooping right in front of my face. Poop all you want fishes, I'll still follow you around! The actual snorkeling trip was awesome except for the fact that it ended too soon. My boyfriend and I had our first stroll in the underwater park; we held hands, while feasting our eyes on huge curiously-shaped corals and fishes. The whole thing was pretty romantic…except for the fact that the actual reason I held onto his hand was because I was afraid of what might be lurking underneath the corals..and I found out after the trip, that he was holding onto my hand for the exact same reason….*sigh*

To describe the whole trip requires a longer post than this and the fact that I am kinda lazy to finish the post properly. But I'll tell you this much. There were blood-thirsty sharks out there preying on unsuspecting human paddling happily in the water with their fake fins and ugly goggles.. Which is, of course, another story altogether.

Wish List 1

Boyfriend, remember how I went on and on about wanting to wear a jumpsuit but not sure how while looking longingly at the gorgeous floral jumpsuit on the mannequin behind the display window? Well, here's Hana Tajima showing how :

Brilliant ain't it? Since winter has arrived (it has, for all I care, judging by the shivers I get whenever I step out of the house), I'll save this look for next summer!

In the meantime, I'm just in total awe for this :

Beyootiful. Thanks to stunning lady at Cameron Highlands who wore the classic black Doc Martens boots with girly summer dress. You've inspired me. Problem is, mahai nya boots ni! It sells at almost 200 Euros on e-bay, wth?? So it's gotta have to wait for a while..

The Story Of The Other Pied Piper

It was several nights after Raya that we decided to have dinner at KFC. Not sure if it was a wise choice but hunger drove our stomachs to make irrelevant decisions at times, even though we had practically stuffed our stomach non-stop since the end of Ramadhan.

At this particular time of the year, KFC was filled with kids in baju raya running about rampant, as if they were let loose only this one time a year, screaming and crying and spilling food and drinks everywhere, basically acting like little monsters on LSD. Not that I hate kids, just that I only ever pay attention to the cute ones, the rest I find annoying. I am secretly afraid that karma will play a cruel practical joke on me by granting me offsprings from the latter group in the future. I pray a lot that that won't happen.

It was pure luck that we found a parking spot without having to wait so long considering the crowd at that time. It wasn't a particularly favourable spot as it was located directly next to a huge dumpster. But beggars can't be choosers. Plus the three kids in our car were already starting to claw each other's eyeballs out, as a result for being in close proximity with each other for an extended period of time, so they have to be let out asap.

As my mother was perfecting her reverse parking, something peculiar caught my eyes. From where I was sitting inside the car, I noticed a figure squatting behind the dumpster, deeply preoccupied with something. Upon closer look, I realized that it was a young man, in his late 20s, fumbling through a large black plastic bag, bulging with trash.

Oh just another madman. Or another sad homeless. There are quite a few I recognize out and about the small town of Alor Setar. But not this guy. And so I continued to observe.

He had managed to collect several handful of fried chicken leftovers, that might last him for about three days, four if he's thrifty, and given that the chicken doesn't rot first. I wasn't the only audience there; the passengers of several other cars who were waiting for the next available parking spot were also watching with interest, or rather, for simply passing the time with this curious scene.

Just as we thought we had it all figured out, the guy gathered all his findings, put it on a piece of old newspaper and placed them on the curb that is quite far from the pathway of cars. He made a sound with his mouth and as if by magic, like Pied Piper blowing his horn, except that this time, what comes out from hiding were not rats but stray cats. They feasted on whatever the guy had collected like there was no tomorrow.

I felt like an asshole of the grandest kind when I compared myself to that guy with such a big heart and because I had quickly dismissed him as a loser homeless guy earlier. Turns out, he wasn't a homeless after all. I didn't notice that underneath the black jacket he was wearing, there was a vertical-striped shirt, a standard KFC staff uniform. I wasn't the only one engrossed with the scene, the rest of the audience was too. Apparently, the three little monsters in our car had stopped fighting with each other and had their attention fixated on the guy, the cats, and an unexpected act of random kindness.

Plenty of Paper

Months ago I saw a secret on PostSecret that is eerily similar to mine, that I have never told a soul. Reading them in words took out the monster from the secret in a way, that someone else somewhere in this world is sharing the same secret as mine.

I am ready to put that one final baggage to rest once I saw another secret plastered across PostSecret's website a couple of weeks ago. Even though I know there was hardly a chance in the entire lifetime that the secret was written by the person who has wronged me years and years ago, I accepted it as the person’s apology, gathered and sent in by the force of the universe. Now, I couldn’t reject an apology offered by the universal force, could I? I hope that that person will go on and have a good life. I do not hate that person as much as Ellen might hate Tiger Woods now, not that their actions are comparable in magnitude.

It was time to have an early spring cleaning. I deleted all of my previous posts.

The posts carry baggage that I didn’t need anymore, never needed anyway, so it was only fair to myself that I threw them away and made sure that they were burnt into ashes. And stomped and jumped on several times for good measures. Good riddance, I’d say.

Some of them were so filthy with self-pity and over-indulgent guilt-trip that is just unnecessary. I couldn't be held responsible for what happened in the world that I didn't have the ability to change or to prevent at that time. The person I am now is not the person who wrote all that stuff.

So long, fucked-up self-esteem. I wouldn't miss you like I'm going to miss my unreliable Compaq laptop, considering the fact that I'm going to get myself a new super slick MacBook. You know just where you stand.